hey, you! happy Saturday!
thanks for reading the second issue of The Kids Are All Right, your weekly source for wholesome content curated by a millennial TikTok addict/journalist. this week i’ve got lots to show you, so let’s get to it.
watch out for the snow goons,
L
🎶 What’s Lena Thinkin’ About? 🎶
this week, my mind has been occupied by three things:
whatever song from evermore wants to be in my brain at any given time,
Christmas presents. i need to send out my Christmas presents. how have i not send out all my Christmas presents!!, and
the way Princess Diana says “gosh” on The Crown.
(i have to say it out loud now so it will leave my head. gosh.)
i do wonder what this time is like when one doesn’t have to concern oneself with Christmas. alas, i’ll never know. i’m so Christian my grandfather wrote a Christmas hymn for my baptism. i’m so Christian i know full choreography to this song. and don’t even get me started on my obsession with nuns, the O.G. female separatists.
i love to give gifts to people, so i’m not so much stressing the season as i am wishing i could devote more time to it. whenever i can, i’m cross stitching up a (snow)storm to try and knock out some personalized presents. i have lost so many embroidery needles. i simply pray to find them again without bloodshed.
of course, this Christmas is going to be a weird one. i won’t be seeing my immediate family, but i am working on plans to maintain my most stable Christmas tradition: watching Love, Actually with my mother. if that hideous ginger dude can get laid in Wisconsin, i can figure out how to simultaneously stream a movie across 1,000 miles.
this week, i’ve also been
🎵 listening to: still evermore, particularly “’tis the damn season.”
👁 watching: the Leah Remini Scientology series (Clearwater, FL represent!!!!)
📚 reading: this essay on sexism and linguistics, as recommended by my friend Erica
The Main Event
here are some of my favorite TikToks i’ve found in the past week.
✨✨✨
Cool Moms
my mom turned 65(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) this week, so in her honor, please have some videos of young’uns praising their mothers.
most brag that they weren’t raised by Karens. for the uninitiated, a Karen is the kind of middle-aged woman who always asks to speak to a manager. my mother is a Carol, which i guess is the sort of woman who raises three kick-ass children and several neurotic animals while working as a public defender for the state of Florida. she loves Indian food, walks by the water, and me. last Christmas, we ditched the rest of our family and went to The Netherlands to see Carel Fabritius’s The Goldfinch in person.
here are some of her cool mom compatriots.
god this TikTok makes me laugh so hard. probably because it’s like looking into my own future.
Karens are out, Robin is IN
i can’t explain it but i trust this woman implicitly
a cool mom rocks out to her favorite song
a cool mom rocks out to a Japanese 80’s hit
a cool mom rocks out to a Japanese 80’s hit: the sequel
Dog Songs
one TikTokker recorded her dog singing a Mariah Carey-esque high note, and the people of the internet did the only good and correct thing: they accompanied him. these videos are so creative and hilarious. it makes me ridiculously happy.
this harmony is genuinely so impressive
just really digging the vibe in this one overall
Cats in Hats
i’ll be honest with you guys: this is mostly an excuse to show you this one user, @sophishrimp, who puts hats on her long-suffering cat, Smitty. i think she may be the funniest person alive. there are some non-Smitty videos in here, too, for varieté.
more Smitty, oh my God this is so funny
more Smitty, and perhaps my favorite video on the entire internet
no hat on this cat, but there is a tutu
no cats under these hats, but there are sea urchins
Misc. Delightful Content
some moments of zen and some stuff that made me snort-laugh.
due to personal reasons i am now moving to Switzerland
just kidding i’m moving to this house
just kidding i’m moving to this girl’s kitchen
is TikTok’s new text-to-speech feature 100% accurate? Nitrogen Monoxide.
i love teachers on TikTok so much
an important voicemail from dad
Dancers of the Week
definitely these guys :’)
that’s it for now! see you on Boxing Day, and remember: if we’re kind and polite, the world will be right. 🐻
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